How often have you chastised yourself, your partner or your children for failing to make a decision? It can be so frustrating to be with someone who has trouble making decisions and it can be debilitating for the indecisive people themselves.
Why do some people have such difficulty with decision-making? Perhaps they were never encouraged and taught as youngsters how to choose. Maybe they have a fear of failure – they can’t cope with the idea of making the wrong decision. Or they could be in a relationship where another person is controlling their every move and making all the decisions. Whatever the reason, people who don’t make decisions lack confidence. They might appear to be relaxed and unflappable – until the time comes when they have to make some decisions for themselves.
To improve your decision-making ability, consider these points:
- The more decisions you make, the more confident you will become.
- Successful people make many decisions every day. Some of these decisions will turn out to be wrong, but many will be right.
- Making a mistake is better than doing nothing. At least we can learn from our mistakes.
- What sort of a role model are you being to your children if they never see you making decisions?
- Encourage your children to make decisions every day.
- When making a decision, watch out for unhelpful thoughts such as: What will people think of me? What if it’s disastrous? What if I come to regret this decision?
- Practice making small decisions first eg what to order in a restaurant, what to wear, what to do on a Sunday.
- Have opinions and encourage your children to have opinions. There is a strong link between people who have trouble making decisions and people who find it difficult to voice their opinion.
- Realise that by not being decisive, you make it difficult for those around you.
- If you are in a relationship where you are not allowed to make decisions or have an opinion, start thinking about whether or not this relationship is good for you.