Incidental couple time

Drinking ChampagneThe benefits of incidental exercise have been drummed into us for years – get off the bus early and walk the rest of the way; take the stairs instead of the lift; get out of your chair and walk to chat to a colleague instead of sending an email. Incidental couple time is just as easy.

Most relationship counsellors push the idea of couple time where the relationship can be nurtured and intimacy restored. But many couples are too busy with work or children to spare an evening or a weekend to be together without interruption. It’s also expensive to routinely use babysitters and eat out. So while I will join the chorus of counsellors recommending spending a regular night together or a weekend away, here are some ways to enjoy some incidental couple time:

  • If the children are all out, don’t do chores – do something together, anything!
  • It can be difficult to find time for romance so enjoy a “quickie” every now and then
  • Meeting for a 15 minute coffee is an easy way to reconnect – it doesn’t have to be a meal
  • Have a conversation over SMS or email – keep it light-hearted or sexy
  • If your partner has an errand to run, go along for the chance to talk in the car
  • If you’re meeting friends at 7.30pm, leave half an hour earlier and stop and have a chat over a glass on wine beforehand
  • Finding 10 minutes to have a cup of tea together on the weekend should be doable – it’s good for the kids to see you talking and laughing instead of always being busy

Most of us can remember snatching any time to be together in the early days of our relationship. Sharing incidental couple time can take you back to those fun days of lust and freedom.

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